Friday, November 14, 2003
Do not, at all costs attempt to buy or even read Madonna's first children's book, The English Roses.The plot is: 4 beautiful English girls don't like another beautiful girl. That's right. 4 beautiful English girls don't like another beautiful girl. The end.
No motives.
No personality.
No insights.
No depth.
No humour.
No logic.
As David Fuhrmann-Lim says, "It is banal, bland and choked with cliches- just like her music in fact."
When questioned during a press conference whether she wants to be the next Enid Blyton, Maddieasked. "Who is she? Is she any good?"
Oh, i don't know, ENid Blyton sold only about 400 million books, wrote 12 000 words a day. Hundreds and thousand of children around the world thrived and grew from her Famous Five, the golliwogs and Noddy. She influenced us in the way best English teachers would and i personally picked up good English from her.
So, yes, Maddie, ole pal, if I'd say Enid Blyton is pretty good, it's the understatement of the entire history of children's books.
Then again Madonna has never been accussed for being smart, and especially with THIS publication it's unlikely anybody will do so anytime soon.
So, if you're (a) thinking of buying this book for a niece of yours for christmas or for her bday or (b) thinking of even browsing through this at Borders, I tell you this- DON'T BOTHER. It's bloody shallow shit that children shouldn't read and it costs a bomb for something so pathetic.
The illustrations, however, by Jeffrey Fulvimari are brilliant. But of course, as David Fuhrmann-Lim says again, "Like all Madonna projects, it's again the turgid truimph of style over substance."
.:I MISS SMALLVILLE! I WANT LEX LUTHOR BAACCCCCKKK!!!:.
posted by Fuzzy @ 22:06
monologue.
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